Life Changing

Do Unto Others As Thou Desirest Unto Thee

Such a Simple Phrase, really

But do we truly understand the deep meaning of that phrase?

I experienced a few events recently that have given me the opportunity to ponder this phrase a little more. Events I would like to share with you. But first I must share some background information to help you understand the significance of this phrase for me.

The back background

Let’s begin back in time. Growing up you could say I was a bit of a loser and a loner. I was the outcast to most of the girls my age in the neighborhood and only one of them would play with me in grade school. Junior High came and I found myself in the library hiding from the teasing and the torment and the ridicule s of Junior High life. In High School I was smart enough to be with all the cool kids in the honor classes but never cool enough to hang out with them. I could count the number of friends I had on one hand.

But despite it all something inside always told me to press on, turn the other cheek, and follow the golden rule. But what I didn't know at that time my heart was also slowly closing in on a true definition of love, kindness and selfless giving. At a young age it was becoming jaded. But move forward I would. I would give unto others, show kindness and try to show people how I wished to be treated.

There would be times when I would think I get this give and take but to eventually find out others would take and take and take of my kindness and generosity until it no longer benefited them and then I was tossed aside like yesterdays garbage. My view becomes a little more jaded.

Now don’t get me wrong, I have met a few people in my life who defy these definitions I have seen in my life and I truly love and admire them. Their example of purity, kindness, and selfless acts of service is what keeps my heart open. Keeps me from giving up on mankind all together. But this is not easy. I have become very closed and sheltered and I question things. If I have asked you for help it has taken A LOT of courage on my end to ask. It is not easy for me. I worry how it will later affect me. There have been a handful of people I have had to rely on in my life and I hope they know my true heartfelt thanks. But there have been other times when I asked for help and a person will make a snarky comment about me asking another person for help. Questioning my motives in asking. When this happens I feel embarrassed, ashamed, and wishing I could hide in a hole. Again my view becomes jaded and I frighten over the thought of asking that person for help again. Sadly the person who helped me usually has no clue and I’m sure they find my future reactions a bit odd. I find myself avoiding and apologizing for even bothering them. But I am truly indebted and grateful to the handful of people who put light into my heart.

The background

Now to switch gears a little but only to help you understand the experiences I want to share. A few years ago I endured 3 foot surgeries in 2 years. During this time I decided to pick up running. I often wonder why because honestly I am not a runner. I do not possess the athletic ability of an athlete but I decided to attempt running anyway. I year ago I was challenged to sign up for a marathon. 26.2 grueling miles!!!!  I accepted the challenge and began preparing for this feat. At the exact same time I decided to run a marathon I decided to begin a Master’s program. My year became a year of going to school, working full time, fulfilling my church calling and attempting to run whenever I could. With the demands of life, I wasn't able to prepare for the run the way I wanted to but I pushed forward anyway I could. The end of June I began experiencing pain from my hips to the tip of my toes. I figured it was due to the fact I was running and preparing for the marathon and keeping up with my busy life.

With horrible excruciating pain I showed up to run the race. I had come this far and I didn't want to back down. Everyone knew I was preparing for this race and I couldn't let them or myself down. In fact some of the people I mentioned previously who have shown me true kindness were there to cheer me to the finish! The race was one of the hardest things I have ever endured. Many times I wondered if I would make it to the finish line. But I kept the finish line forever in my mind and pictured myself crossing the line and picking up my finishers medal. I wanted that medal so badly. I wanted to prove to myself that I did it. That I set out to accomplish a goal and I fulfilled it.

I eventually made it through the finish line and received my medal. Tears still come to my eyes as I remember crossing that finish line and seeing my family waiting for me. The medal has hung in my cubicle at work since the race. The medal has come to mean more to me than a tangible reward. On the back it is engraved Finisher. To some it is just a “Finisher Medal” and means nothing more. To me that word means everything. To me, it means I am a finisher! When life is hard or I feel defeated or wonder if I can endure one more thing I see my medal and realize I can because I am a finisher in this life.

The experiences

Three weeks ago I brought my medal home to share during a church meeting. The night I brought it home I had picked up 3 of my 5 nieces and nephews for a weekend of fun. Upon returning from a night of fun and laughter I received a text message the lock to the door to my house was broken. Just as quickly as I received the message just as quickly I was left alone in the cold with 3 little kids to fix the problem. I got stuck handling the landlord and the locksmith while attempting to keep the children warm and occupied all by myself. One of the kind people I have mentioned previously just happened to be around the corner and text me to enjoy my weekend I had been anticipating for a few weeks now. I relayed the story of the broken lock and how I was trying to juggle it all by myself. Her and her husband came to my rescue to give a much needed and grateful hand. While they had an eye on the children I decided to quickly grab the children’s bag and the items I was going to share in my lesson on Sunday. Just as I shut the door to my car I felt my medal slip out of my arms. In the dark I quickly put everything down and searched frantically for it. To my dismay under the piles of leaves was a drain and my medal fell in. Gone! All I had worked for GONE! We grabbed a broom handle and it didn't even touch the bottom. There was so much water and leaves and the smell was horrible. All I could do in the moment was sit down and cry. Now some may laugh I cried over losing that medal but that medal had come to mean so much to me on a deeper level. I was devastated to say the least.

The Monday after losing my medal I ended up at a new Doctor’s office because the pain I mentioned hasn't gone away. I was told I have stress fractures. Cracks in my bones in my legs!!!!!!!!! Both legs! I was informed I did the marathon that way. I was also told of other feet problem I am having. I didn't even have my medal to show what I endured either.

I shared my story with a few people not thinking anything of it. I was bummed out and just wanted to talk about it. It’s not like there is anything they could do. My medal is at the depth of some scum filled sewer pit and the race is long over. So I thought…..

Two weeks ago I was talking to my Bishop (leader of my church) and he asked me how I was doing since losing my medal and what thoughts went through my head when I lost it. I told him I was sad but what else could I do and I told him he didn't want to know what my thoughts were the moment I realized it was gone. Not a moment I am most proud of that is for sure. Then all of the sudden he tossed me…… MY MEDAL!!!!!

And asked if this would cheer me up. I sat there stunned, shocked, and at a loss for words. I was so overwhelmed and touched by the gesture. After he heard my story he relayed it to the city public works guy and he came out and suctioned all that water, muck, leaves, and horrible nasty smell out of the drain until my medal came up. My heart was opened and I was humbled.

However……. The story continues on. As I retold this experience I found out my neighbor in Idaho who encouraged me to run the marathon called his son for the race director’s number. My neighbor then contacted the race director and retold my story. He got me a new medal. My neighbor was going to surprise me with a new medal over Thanksgiving but I ruined the surprise unknowingly when I excitedly told him about my Bishop. My heart was opened and I was humbled.

The story continues……. I then found out my sis in law who documented this feat with pictures was devastated after I told her about my lost medal and the stress fractures. She later told me I was sick to my stomach that something you worked so hard for was gone. She called every number she could think of trying to get me a new medal. She finally got through and the person said, is she the one who lost it done the drain? Uh…yes she replies. The person said her neighbor here in Idaho has already taken care of it. My heart was opened and I was humbled.

The story continues on……. The director of my division after he heard the story went on line and was in search of finding me a new medal. My new manager was doing the exact same thing then found out our director was. Our office specialist told her husband and they were both so sad for me he was trying to find a magnet heavy enough he could send down the drain. My heart was opened and I was humbled.

The story isn't over……… SO MANY PEOPLE expressed heartfelt sadness for me over losing my medal. They genuinely cared and were saddened f or my loss. Many expressed I thought it was gone like you and didn't think there was anything else we could do. Just those showing me this love and kindness were more than enough.My heart was opened and I was humbled. 

DO unto others as thou desirest unto thee…. It is a simple phrase. But with a meaning much much deeper. I have never received such kindness and thoughtfulness as I have in the past few weeks.  Some times in our lives we, well in my case any way, I often wonder do I matter? Do people really care about me or am I just a passerby who is unnoticed? If I was to die tomorrow (which I sure hope I don’t) but if I did would anyone come to my funeral?

Well that small act changed my whole outlook. I realized that people knew how much something as insignificant as a medal meant the world to me. They knew I worked hard to accomplish this. It was the ultimate act of kindness. True Christ-like kindness and now whenever I look upon my medal or I should say my 2 medals they will have a deeper meaning, a more significant meaning. Thank you for showing me the kindness and generosity of others. Some of these people I don’t associate with on a daily basis as in my close circle of contacts but to them little me meant something.

Even though I struggle with true heartfelt kindness from others because I haven’t always seen it in my life my thought process has been forever changed. Just because some people take advantage of my kindness and giving to them, just because some people make snarky comments and I feel embarrassed afterwards this is NOT the whole world. There are more than a small handful of people out there who are genuine, who are kind, who know what it means to mourn with those who mourn, and above all who daily live and has taught me to continue to:

Do Unto Others As Thou Desirest Unto Thee

It Matters!

It’s Real!

It has forever changed me!