Do Unto Others As Thou Desirest Unto Thee
Such a Simple Phrase, really
But do we truly understand the deep meaning of that phrase?
I experienced a few events
recently that have given me the opportunity to ponder this phrase a little
more. Events I would like to share with you. But first I must share some
background information to help you understand the significance of this phrase
for me.
The back background
Let’s begin back in time.
Growing up you could say I was a bit of a loser and a loner. I was the outcast
to most of the girls my age in the neighborhood and only one of them would play
with me in grade school. Junior High came and I found myself in the library
hiding from the teasing and the torment and the ridicule s of Junior High life.
In High School I was smart enough to be with all the cool kids in the honor
classes but never cool enough to hang out with them. I could count the number
of friends I had on one hand.
But despite it all something
inside always told me to press on, turn the other cheek, and follow the golden
rule. But what I didn't know at that time my heart was also slowly closing in on
a true definition of love, kindness and selfless giving. At a young age it was
becoming jaded. But move forward I would. I would give unto others, show
kindness and try to show people how I wished to be treated.
There would be times when I
would think I get this give and take but to eventually find out others would
take and take and take of my kindness and generosity until it no longer
benefited them and then I was tossed aside like yesterdays garbage. My view
becomes a little more jaded.
Now don’t get me wrong, I have
met a few people in my life who defy these definitions I have seen in my life
and I truly love and admire them. Their example of purity, kindness, and
selfless acts of service is what keeps my heart open. Keeps me from giving up
on mankind all together. But this is not easy. I have become very closed and
sheltered and I question things. If I have asked you for help it has taken A
LOT of courage on my end to ask. It is not easy for me. I worry how it will
later affect me. There have been a handful of people I have had to rely on in
my life and I hope they know my true heartfelt thanks. But there have been
other times when I asked for help and a person will make a snarky comment about
me asking another person for help. Questioning my motives in asking. When this
happens I feel embarrassed, ashamed, and wishing I could hide in a hole. Again
my view becomes jaded and I frighten over the thought of asking that person for
help again. Sadly the person who helped me usually has no clue and I’m sure
they find my future reactions a bit odd. I find myself avoiding and apologizing
for even bothering them. But I am truly indebted and grateful to the handful of
people who put light into my heart.
The background
Now to switch gears a little
but only to help you understand the experiences I want to share. A few years
ago I endured 3 foot surgeries in 2 years. During this time I decided to pick
up running. I often wonder why because honestly I am not a runner. I do not
possess the athletic ability of an athlete but I decided to attempt running
anyway. I year ago I was challenged to sign up for a marathon. 26.2 grueling
miles!!!! I accepted the challenge and
began preparing for this feat. At the exact same time I decided to run a
marathon I decided to begin a Master’s program. My year became a year of going
to school, working full time, fulfilling my church calling and attempting to
run whenever I could. With the demands of life, I wasn't able to prepare for
the run the way I wanted to but I pushed forward anyway I could. The end of
June I began experiencing pain from my hips to the tip of my toes. I figured it
was due to the fact I was running and preparing for the marathon and keeping up
with my busy life.
With horrible excruciating
pain I showed up to run the race. I had come this far and I didn't want to back
down. Everyone knew I was preparing for this race and I couldn't let them or
myself down. In fact some of the people I mentioned previously who have shown
me true kindness were there to cheer me to the finish! The race was one of the
hardest things I have ever endured. Many times I wondered if I would make it to
the finish line. But I kept the finish line forever in my mind and pictured
myself crossing the line and picking up my finishers medal. I wanted that medal
so badly. I wanted to prove to myself that I did it. That I set out to
accomplish a goal and I fulfilled it.
I eventually made it through
the finish line and received my medal. Tears still come to my eyes as I
remember crossing that finish line and seeing my family waiting for me. The
medal has hung in my cubicle at work since the race. The medal has come to mean
more to me than a tangible reward. On the back it is engraved Finisher. To some
it is just a “Finisher Medal” and means nothing more. To me that word means
everything. To me, it means I am a finisher! When life is hard or I feel
defeated or wonder if I can endure one more thing I see my medal and realize I
can because I am a finisher in this life.
The experiences
Three weeks ago I brought my
medal home to share during a church meeting. The night I brought it home I had
picked up 3 of my 5 nieces and nephews for a weekend of fun. Upon returning
from a night of fun and laughter I received a text message the lock to the door
to my house was broken. Just as quickly as I received the message just as
quickly I was left alone in the cold with 3 little kids to fix the problem. I got stuck handling the landlord and the locksmith while attempting to
keep the children warm and occupied all by myself. One of the kind people I
have mentioned previously just happened to be around the corner and text me to
enjoy my weekend I had been anticipating for a few weeks now. I relayed the
story of the broken lock and how I was trying to juggle it all by myself. Her and her
husband came to my rescue to give a much needed and grateful hand. While they
had an eye on the children I decided to quickly grab the children’s bag and the
items I was going to share in my lesson on Sunday. Just as I shut the door to
my car I felt my medal slip out of my arms. In the dark I quickly put
everything down and searched frantically for it. To my dismay under the piles
of leaves was a drain and my medal fell in. Gone! All I had worked for GONE! We
grabbed a broom handle and it didn't even touch the bottom. There was so much
water and leaves and the smell was horrible. All I could do in the moment was
sit down and cry. Now some may laugh I cried over losing that medal but that
medal had come to mean so much to me on a deeper level. I was devastated to say
the least.
The Monday after losing my
medal I ended up at a new Doctor’s office because the pain I mentioned hasn't gone away. I was told I have stress fractures. Cracks in my bones in my
legs!!!!!!!!! Both legs! I was informed I did the marathon that way. I was also
told of other feet problem I am having. I didn't even have my medal to show
what I endured either.
I shared my story with a few
people not thinking anything of it. I was bummed out and just wanted to talk
about it. It’s not like there is anything they could do. My medal is at the
depth of some scum filled sewer pit and the race is long over. So I thought…..
Two weeks ago I was talking to
my Bishop (leader of my church) and he asked me how I was doing since losing my
medal and what thoughts went through my head when I lost it. I told him I was
sad but what else could I do and I told him he didn't want to know what my
thoughts were the moment I realized it was gone. Not a moment I am most proud
of that is for sure. Then all of the sudden he tossed me…… MY MEDAL!!!!!
And asked
if this would cheer me up. I sat there stunned, shocked, and at a loss for
words. I was so overwhelmed and touched by the gesture. After he heard my story
he relayed it to the city public works guy and he came out and suctioned all
that water, muck, leaves, and horrible nasty smell out of the drain until my
medal came up. My heart was opened and I was humbled.
However……. The story continues
on. As I retold this experience I found out my neighbor in Idaho who encouraged
me to run the marathon called his son for the race director’s number. My
neighbor then contacted the race director and retold my story. He got me a new
medal. My neighbor was going to surprise me with a new medal over Thanksgiving
but I ruined the surprise unknowingly when I excitedly told him about my
Bishop. My heart was opened and I was humbled.
The story continues……. I then
found out my sis in law who documented this feat with pictures was devastated
after I told her about my lost medal and the stress fractures. She later told
me I was sick to my stomach that something you worked so hard for was gone. She
called every number she could think of trying to get me a new medal. She finally
got through and the person said, is she the one who lost it done the drain? Uh…yes
she replies. The person said her neighbor here in Idaho has already taken care
of it. My heart was opened and I was humbled.
The story continues on……. The
director of my division after he heard the story went on line and was in search
of finding me a new medal. My new manager was doing the exact same thing then
found out our director was. Our office specialist told her husband and they
were both so sad for me he was trying to find a magnet heavy enough he could
send down the drain. My heart was opened and I was humbled.
The story isn't over……… SO
MANY PEOPLE expressed heartfelt sadness for me over losing my medal. They
genuinely cared and were saddened f or my loss. Many expressed I thought it was
gone like you and didn't think there was anything else we could do. Just those
showing me this love and kindness were more than enough.My heart was opened and I was humbled.
DO unto others as thou
desirest unto thee…. It is a simple phrase. But with a meaning much much
deeper. I have never received such kindness and thoughtfulness as I have in the
past few weeks. Some times in our lives
we, well in my case any way, I often wonder do I matter? Do people really care
about me or am I just a passerby who is unnoticed? If I was to die tomorrow
(which I sure hope I don’t) but if I did would anyone come to my funeral?
Well that small act changed my
whole outlook. I realized that people knew how much something as insignificant
as a medal meant the world to me. They knew I worked hard to accomplish this.
It was the ultimate act of kindness. True Christ-like kindness and now whenever
I look upon my medal or I should say my 2 medals they will have a deeper meaning, a more significant meaning. Thank you for showing me the kindness and generosity of others. Some of these people
I don’t associate with on a daily basis as in my close circle of contacts but
to them little me meant something.
Even though I struggle with
true heartfelt kindness from others because I haven’t always seen it in my life
my thought process has been forever changed. Just because some people take
advantage of my kindness and giving to them, just because some people make
snarky comments and I feel embarrassed afterwards this is NOT the whole world.
There are more than a small handful of people out there who are genuine, who
are kind, who know what it means to mourn with those who mourn, and above all who
daily live and has taught me to continue to:
Do Unto Others As Thou Desirest Unto Thee
It Matters!
It’s Real!
It has forever changed me!